Waiting…

{ March 7, 2009 @ 4:37 am } · { My spiritual life }
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What do you do? When you have tried loving a person over and over, no matter how many times they hurt you on purpose or not, when do you say enough is enough? They spit in your face and then they come back to wipe it off just so they can do it again. They say they love you but their actions are completely that of somebody who just doesn’t want anything to do with you. Just wondering… because I really feel like I’m up against the Fists of the Devil who is swinging away like Barry Bonds at a home run derby.

I am getting my tail kicked.

Obviously Jesus tells us to keep turning the other cheek and don’t give up on them. After all God never gives up on us. We sin again and again and again and again (I could keep going but it would never end) and he keeps forgiving us.

Okay maybe you could, but…

What about if this person is causing you to be miserable and you are forced to put all of your dreams on hold so you could be faithful to forgiveness and servanthood. I don’t know about you, but I don’t know many people who would. I guess it’s just so hard to be patient and not be selfish. It takes discipline to a whole another level.

Waiting on a dream is one thing but waiting on something that brings misery and pain is another.  I guess this is what separates Mice from Men. Who is willing to wait on a hopeless future so they can please GOD? Or are you a Man for waiting or just another fool who was blinded by a vision that was closed minded.

Enlighten me if you have the answers. Maybe I just make it a lot harder then it really is.

Ben Folds

{ March 5, 2009 @ 12:04 am } · { Movies, Music, Sports... }
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So I finally got some time to comment on the Ben Folds concert this past Sunday. It was so worth every single snowflake, every minute I lost sleeping, the crazy and insane ride back home and definitely worth the $40 ticket. Not only did Ben Folds absolutely rock the show but before he even came out, a new band called Miniature Tigers and this UNCG acapella Band kept things extremely entertaining. A total of 3 1/2 hours of non stop music. The music was great, especially Ben Folds banging away on the piano, but what really stole the show was the non stop hilarity. I felt like I was at a comedy show. Miniature Tigers kept saying: “We are the Jonas Brothers”. They just kept picking about it. Ben Folds would talk in between songs and sometimes I was looking forward to that more then the music. The acapella band was awesome. Ben Folds actually did an audition to pick the best acapella band in the US and ended up picking the UNCG guys. He is making an acapella album this year and it will include them. They were amazing I’m telling you.

So anyone I invited to go should feel pretty bummed out about not going, because you missed out on one of the best shows ever. Sorry, maybe next time. I almost wish that he was having another show around here somewhere. I would go again in a heartbeat.

I added a video of him performing the song Free Coffee in which he uses an Altoids can that he places on the piano strings and then ads distortion to it all. It is pretty original I though and gives the piano a whole new meaning to sound. He did this at the show this past Sunday and everybody went nuts. Enjoy…

God the Magician

{ February 23, 2009 @ 8:08 pm } · { My spiritual life }
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Somebody once told me that Focus was overrated because you see every blemishing mistake you made but you can’t change it. I let you agree or disagree but I will tell you that I personally have had a lot of questions lately. Questions seem to get me back on focus.  It’s funny because questions seem to be a reoccurring thing with me. Rob Bell once said that asking God questions is a good thing. If you don’t ask how will you ever know.

So I ask this. Can I keep fighting for my wife for a lifetime? Can I truly follow God if I keep obsessing over this one thing? Is moving on okay? Is remarrying okay? Is the best thing to do is leave everything behind and go serve God fully, till the point of hunger and cold? How can I truly serve him here if I am surrounded by happily married couples when God wants me to be single forever? Does God want me to be single forever? Is staying where I am just going to tempt me to get remarried again? And most of all, Why is the Bible not more clear on Divorce and what you can do after?

Can we say frustration till the point of insanity. Yes we can. So then I read John 12:26.  It says: “Whoever serves me must follow me, and where I am, my servant also will be. “

Wow, can we say revelation now. This passage should help anyone struggling with anything, not just divorce. Whenever the bible is not 100% clear on something and it doesn’t say Thou shalt or thou shalt not, you are to fall back on this passage. As long as you are focused on following and serving God, you are doing the right thing. Maybe, just maybe God will take you to another man or woman who he then will make it clear to you to marry again. Then who are we to say no to God. Just follow him and don’t look at what if I did this or what if I did that. Just follow him and he will decide what is best for you, whether that is remarriage or whatever else there could be.

Not every outcome will be the same. Just follow God and trust that he will show you yours. Most of the time this will be completely different then you thought it would be. That’s just how he works. God the magician. He has the element of surprise. Chris Angel who?

The Love Dare

{ February 17, 2009 @ 3:30 pm } · { Movies, Music, Sports..., My spiritual life }
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So I just recently watched Fireproof. I must say that Kirk Cameron has gotten better over the years. I remember the old Left Behind movies and how terrible of an actor he was. I was slightly surprised, too bad the rest of the cast on Fireproof sucked. The movie as a whole wasn’t bad though. Story wise it earned my points, after a lot of frustration that is.

Frustration. That’s what came out of me as I was watching the movie. Not because I was feeling horrible for this married couple but because I was hoping to get some answers for my self.  Don’t you just hate it when someone says:” This or that is the reason why marriages don’t work out”, but then you look at yours and the reason is completely different. That’s what I felt like when I was watching this movie. My relationship issues seem to be so drastically different then the regular sob stories I hear day in and day out, like:” He emotionally abused me, or I had to do everything around here, or we had money issues, or he cheated on me.” So cliche and yet I’m still left without an answer.

But then, there was the Love Dare. Kirk Cameron’s character took a 40 day Love Dare to save his marriage and each day he has to do one special thing for his wife. I though this was a great concept but I was frustrated yet again because I wished I could get a hold of this book so I can try it myself. Funny how fate had me in the Bookstore and right in front of me it was. The Love Dare book just as seen in the motion picture Fireproof. I picked it up and I’m on day 2 now. There are already some very interesting things in there. Who knows, maybe it will be my favorite movie of all time if it gets me my wife back. If not, it’s 2 1/2 stars until then.

What is Love?

{ February 13, 2009 @ 6:01 pm } · { My spiritual life }
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No not the song. What is love, really?

I have really felt lukewarm as of lately. Lukewarm as in just ordinary. I never wanted to be just ordinary for God. I always wanted to do spectacular things with my life. I always wanted to change the life of others through God. Well I have found that I have been doing the exact opposite of that. I have been all about myself. Yeah sure I might help a neighbor out, work harder at work, fight for my marriage, attend church on a regular basis, do things for others when the opportunity presents itself, but I haven’t been TRYING. I have let things come to me instead of being a driving force. I want to be more radical. True love is not being willing to give up your life for another but actually doing it. I am notorious, along with a million of other Christians, for saying it, but not doing it.

I prayed last night and this morning that God makes something in my life happen to where I have a chance to change my life completely for him. For him to do something so I can have a way out of being about myself but all about him. For a way, if he so desired, for me to sell all of my things and go live poor and use all that I have to feed the homeless and tell them about Christ.

I am trying to decipher what he wants me to do. I know, maybe I shouldn’t read into it, but just go and do it. Unfortunatelly my problems are not that simple to solve. Try to decipher wether God wants you to live a life as a husband when you are already married or if he wants  you to sell all of your posessions and go live poor when that would mean leaving your marriage. I don’t know. I hate having to wait. Maybe I’ll write a blog soon about waiting, and how it drives me crazy. Either way, please pray for me, so I can make the best decision for God.

I’ll leave you with a quote from Francis Chan when he was asked if he thinks God calls him to live a radical, crazy life: “It’s not that this lifestyle should be crazy to us. It should be the only thing that makes sense. Giving up everything and sacrificing everything for the afterlife is logical. “Crazy” is living a safe life and storing up things while trying to enjoy our time on earth, knowing that any millisecond God could take your life. To me that is crazy, and that is radical. The crazy ones are the ones who live life like there is no God. To me that is insanity.”

Muse

{ February 11, 2009 @ 8:14 pm } · { Movies, Music, Sports... }
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I have been listening to a lot of music lately. It has sort of been a stress relief. In the process I discovered a lot of new bands and artist that I truely enjoy. Muse is one of those bands. I have heard of them before but could never really get into them. Maybe I just heard the wrong song the first time around. I gave them another listen and I was blown away. They have slowly climbed my all-time favorite list. I think the song Sunburn started my Muse craze. It was their first song off their first album. Ther is something about the keyboards in this song that fascinated me.  Normaly people associate Keyboard sounds with a piano and that makes them associate any song that has keyboards in it as boring. Keyboards are like violins to some people. I don’t understand why. Beats me. But just to try to sway some of you, here is a clip of Muse performing Sunburn live. Amazing…

If you liked Muse and would like to check out more of their music, you have to hear the following songs as well: Uno, Plug In Baby, Feeling Good, Time is Running Out, Hysteria, Supermassive Black Hole. Those are just some of my favorites.

Can’t wait till they tour. I would love to see them live.  Which brings me to my next point. Concerts. I will try to go to more shows this year. I really miss the atmosphere of thousands of people singing the same songs. Something about it sends chills through my body. So my first concert this year will be Ben Folds, beginning of March.  I’m pumped.

Later Baby Birds

I’m back… let’s see if I can stick

{ February 10, 2009 @ 10:21 pm } · { Random Talk }
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I don’t know why but I suddenly got the urge to blog again. Last time I got on here I attempted to keep blogging but then it proved that my endurance was that of a fat man at a triathlon. I’m gonna put more effort behind it this time and actually try to be an adhesive of sort. Glue like to the blog world. Please don’t hold me accountable though because it will be even more devastating to have to hear my own failures being rubbed in.  Just enjoy I guess and feed of the words from a man who is at times speechless and drink from the creativity from a man who is at times scatterbrained. I don’t promise pleasure but I do hope it won’t hurt. I apologize if it does in advance.

Till we meet again… I shall be back. Until then, here is a video to make you smile for now.

Flight Of The Conchords: The Tape of Love

Movie of the Year

{ June 1, 2008 @ 7:29 am } · { Movies, Music, Sports... }
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I’ve been thoroughly excited about this day. The day for me to finally wrap up what I thought about the movies of last year and to rank them in order of favorites.

I love movies and it’s comforting to know I’m not the only one. They are the escape goat from reality but it’s funny how the movies about reality end up being my favorites. Movies are our way to relate and experience the power of stories and art. They are modern day books. It’s sad to say though that the majority of people watch mainly Hollywood Blockbusters, cheesy Comedies, Romantic Comedies and lame Horror flicks. I’m not judging because I like to watch those as well. I just hope to persuade you to see more movies that will change your life because let’s be honest Spider-Man and Transformers won’t do that.

How hard is life? Most of the times harsh and rarely easy. Often depressing and often happy. Sometimes you feel lonely and sometimes very loved. The reality of life can change a man/woman. It can break you down and tear you to pieces. The reality of life is hard to see. We don’t want to look and analyze it. We fake the smile and let the show go on. This is also true in movies. When I watch movies I look for reality. That is the number one thing. All the rest comes second. 

On another note, this has been a record year for me. I have seen 74 films that came out in 2007, by far the most in a year. Last year it was around 50 and I must say that ‘07 was not a bad year at all. It took me a long time to realize that at first because I thought for the longest that it was one of the worst. In January and February we had some great stuff come out and 5 of my top 10 movies came out during those 2 months. After a long stretch of sucky movies finally I started seeing some great stuff coming out of the wood works.

Enjoy and if you haven’t seen the movies from my top 10 then I suggest you check them out and give them a try. You won’t be disappointed. I decided to post all of the movies I have seen this past year. Reason being that when other critics post their top 10 of the year its because they only watched about 20 films. This is not a fair rating so therefore I give it to you all so you can see that I did my work.

1.Once *****   So simple and so quite real. Never seen anything like it before.
2. Into The Wild ***** Amazing story about confusion in life and the search for a greater destiny. Some scenes will have you on the verge of tears.
3. Atonement ****1/2  How important is it to forgive someone and to atone for your mistakes? You learn that here and while you are doing that you will see one of the most beautiful scenes in recent film history. Check out the Beach scene.
4. Juno ****1/2  It’s impossible to not like this movie. It is so easy to watch and so full of new life. A breath of fresh air.
5. Black Book ****1/2  A WWII movie form a females perspective. The best performance by a lady this year for me. Powerful story of survival and a real look at how sex was a powerful manipulation tool even during a war.
6. The Lives Of Others ****1/2  Probably the most touching story of all year. One man sacrifices his life for something he believes in. Not unusual for a movie you say, but he never takes credit for it.
7. This Is England ****1/2  You want to see a movie about the struggles of racism then watch This Is England not Crash.
8. No Country For Old Men ****1/2 Other then it being a bit predictable and reminding me of last years Departed, there is nothing wrong with this movie. Guys will most definitely enjoy it.
9. The Host **** Cloverfield who? Watch the Host instead, at least we know where the monster came from, not to mention it looks a hundred times cooler.
10. The Lookout **** Joseph Gordon Levitt is quickly becoming one of my favorite actors. Great performance, great movie.
11. The Bourne Ultimatum ****
12. The King Of Kong ****
13. Lars And The Real Girl ****
14. Zodiac ****
15. There Will Be Blood ****
16. Michael Clayton ****
17. Breach ****
18. The Assassination Of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford ****
19. Right At Your Door ****
20. Ratatouille ****
21. Superbad ***1/2
22. Gone Baby Gone ***1/2
23. The Namesake ***1/2
24. Eastern Promises ***1/2
25. Black Snake Moan ***1/2
26. The Hoax ***1/2
27. Knocked Up ***1/2
28. 3:10 To Yuma ***1/2
29. Death Sentence ***1/2
30. Sweeney Todd ***1/2
31. Charlie Wilson’s War ***1/2
32. Before The Devil Knows You’re Dead ***1/2
33. American Gangster ***1/2
34. Paris Je T’Aime ***1/2
35. 300 ***
36. Freedom Writers ***
37. The Darjeeling Limited ***
38. Rendition ***
39. Disturbia ***
40. The Kite Runner ***
41. I’m Not There ***
42. Rescue Dawn ***
43. Reservation Road ***
44. Hot Fuzz ***
45. In The Valley Of Elah ***
46. The Brave One ***
47. I Am Legend ***
48. We Own The Night ***
49. Trade ***
50. Oceans 13 ***
51. Reign Over Me ***
52. King Of California ***
53. Shooter ***
54. Amazing Grace ***
55. A Mighty Heart ***
56. The Orphanage **1/2
57. Things We Lost In The Fire **1/2
58. Man Push Cart **1/2
59. The Mist **1/2
60. Fracture **1/2
61. He Was A Quiet Man **1/2
62. Transformers **1/2
63. Live Free Or Die Hard **1/2
64. Pirates Of The Caribbean: At World’s End **
65. The Number 23 **
66. Spider-Man 3 **
67. Lucky You **
68. 1408 **
69. War ** 

 
Worst 5 Movies of the Year

5. Curse Of The Golden Flower *1/2
4. I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry *1/2
3. Evan Almighty *1/2
2. The Golden Compass *1/2
1. Premonition *

Radiohead Concert

{ May 10, 2008 @ 11:07 am } · { Uncategorized }
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How do you talk about an experience that was beyond cool? I can’t truly write a review, all I can say is WOW! My really good friend Matt got a ticket for me a while back so I didn’t exactly know what to expect. Well, my expectations were beyond met, they were annihilated. The fact that it rained a little and thunder and lightning struck all around us added to it. I got to meet some really down to earth people as well.

Once I got to Charlotte we hung out at Matt’s friends place. We got something to eat and got in the van to go to the concert. The pre-concert music Matt and Rah mixed together was amazing, so the ride there was lovely. People were tailgating and all over the place. We even had a girl come up to us and ask us if we knew where she could get some dose. We said no and apologized, all scratching our heads trying to figure out what in the world dose meant. After a few texts between friends we figured out it was acid. Oh well, the poor girl didn’t need anymore that’s for sure. So after a long walk and great conversation we got to our seats and waited with anticipation.

After 30 minutes of waiting Thom Yorke’s voice came through with “All I Need” and everybody was on their feet screaming. They ended up doing around 20-25 songs including All I Need, Airbag, 15 Step, Sail to the Moon, Nude, Weir Fishes, Ideoteque, Videotape, Bodysnatchers, Go Slowly, Talk Show Host, Paranoid Android and finished it with my favorite song Reckoner. I had an amazing time. The music, the people, the atmosphere all got me itching to get back to doing my own music again. Maybe soon.

The after concert party at Rah’s place was fun too. Just the right thing to end a memorable night. A Mojito mixed by Matt himself, a long talk about movies between Rah and I, stories about crazy exes (including the infamous Leah/Chris story/ ask me about it), and finally the lay-down of law on some Wii Bowling and Tennis.

The next concert we are planning is Coldplay after they release their new album. I’m so pumped.

Doing What is Right?

{ April 30, 2008 @ 2:43 pm } · { Movies, Music, Sports... }
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So this week was a week for the books. Not the books that the public can enjoy but only for the misery of a lone individual and God who reads everything. I watched 4 movies this week and found it hard to focus when so much is on the mind. Either way I pulled it off and here is what I got out of it.

No Country For Old Men (2007) ****

I Am Legend (2007) **1/2

Unforgiven (1992) ***

Changing Lanes (2002) ***1/2

Something I learned by watching all of these movies was how hard it is to make the right decisions and how our will causes our destinies. This could be argued and you could say that God knew it would happen already because he knows everything and like I said last week he is everything. I won’t argue with you because I don’t know whether our decisions drive our life or whether God just wanted it so. All I know is that every human being on this planet has the choice to be a good human being. You make these choices Mon-Sun and the wrong choices seem to always come back and kick your ass. Call it Karma or call it God, I call it both.

In I Am Legend we have a guy that has to make a last minute decision, putting his life on the line for something greater then him. In Unforgiven we have a man that is struggling with his counsciuos throughout the movie.  In No Country For Old Men our guy takes the wrong path and although he is a good human being at heart ultimately his decisions come back to haunt him. But no other movie, even though not my favorite this week, showcases this more. Two men cross paths and because of a small error and a wrong decision end up having their life cave in right in front of their eyes and all that is left at the end is right or wrong. Which one will it be?

Its hard, its hard, and once more it is so freaking hard to make the right choices when your feelings and doubts are all you know. Everything tells you to do one thing but the only opposition is right or wrong which is very clear cut but very sharp and lethal. Someone once told me that there is never a right or wrong but just a blurred middle that we have to settle with. I don’t know, I am not all knowing. As a matter of fact I am a man of less knowledge then most. What I pray for daily is wisdom, the ability to make the right decision at the right time. God sure is letting me have my shot at it now. You get what you ask for at a price you didn’t expect, so be careful when you ask next time.

Peace

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